-I love love letters

I hate how much i miss you.

I try to put you out of my mind, worried that the more i think of you the more our relationship will be based in the past, not wanting my affection of you to be based on before....
so, i push you out of my mind, in order to establish a real connection, apart from that of which we had before . in an attempt to establish a potential future, rather than dwelling on the past.......

since we're apart, i feel like we'll often only have the past as a reference and i dont want that. i want us to be in the now, but not being there for each other debilitates (sp?) our ability to do so.

i miss you more than i want to admit.
I think about you all the time, and it freaks me out,

I dont know whether people fall in love with how they are treated or they actual person, this is something i've always contemplated but either way its scary. i've never loved anyone before. (for reiterations' sake i'm not saying i love you baby, but that love scares me x)

I miss, the way you talk to me,
the way you touch my hand when your driving, or beside me.
your openness.
the way you look into my eyes and demand nothing but honesty.
I miss your tenderness, and your sweetness.
I miss you inside me, our intimacy wrapping around us like a blanket on a cold winters day, i just miss us. which does seem ridiculous considering the time frame, but it is what it is, and i still miss it.

which often seems ridiculous considering i didnt feel this way with people ihad been seeing for over a year, and yet i see you a week and cant help myself.

I dunno baby, i'm not trying to be a sook, and i'm sorry if its gettin old to you, i guess i just appreciate what we had, and i miss you is all, and i dont know any other way to express it. i cant be intimate with you, i can only write you how i feel, and i know that that may not suffice, but take it for what it is i guess :)


missin you heaps and wishin we could be together
xoxo

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx